It's a sweet life here in Zihuatanejo...but not for everyone

We have a favorite beach restaurant along the wide arc of sand that stretches from Playa Larga at the west end to Barra de Potosi at the eastern edge.  Along Playa Blanca is the cabana "Chula Vida"...and this sweet life is how I like to think of my time here.  I feel so blessed to be able to wake up in the morning and step outside into the warm morning air, listening to hummingbirds at my feeder as I read the paper.  After a cup of coffee, I head up to yoga at Hotel Irma where the terrace provides the perfect venue for an ever changing yoga practice.  

 After a breakfast with Gene, our days can be spent visiting friends, travelling to nearby places, relaxing at our pool and shopping cooking meals of fresh local ingredients.  The nights are spent outside with live music in the streets and the town coming to life when the air is cool enough to venture out and play ball sports, or simply sit at one of the local cafe's or lounge spots along the waterfront.   We are no longer "tourists" and we do enjoy a standard of life here that is very nice.  Although not extravagant with our spending, we rarely go without something we want or would like to do.   Life is "sweet"...  












But within a block of our home, the life of one of the women I spend a lot of my time with is not as simple.   I have a project this year, that my friend Dawn and I have named "Sol Sisters", for on many levels, the concept of "sol"..sun, alma, soul is what drives life.  And never having had a birth sister, I have yearned for sisterhood of friendships my entire life.  I came to know a local woman named Lety via my friend Monica and her mother in law Isabel a couple of years ago.  These woman all live in my community and are my friends.   Lety is our seamstress "sol Sister"  making our very popular and colorful Mexican oilcloth bags and barbeque covers and our hope is that by making our orders she will have an improved income and perhaps become self sufficient in the future.  I have a secondary goal of using any profit that might be realized to fund local projects in our community.  Women's projects as I see the lives of Mexican women to be difficult in many ways.   This project has taken up a lot of my time in this first month of living here as I build a system and skills for communicating our pre-made orders to my Spanish speaking seamstress and track expenses, products and design new potential products that my friends here are asking for.  Think yoga mat carriers, mens' beach bags and home IV nurse bags. 

This week Lety shared her reality with me.  Behind her ever present smile and willing work ethic, she is the sole breadwinner in her home.  She is responsible for every bill payment, every meal purchase, every ounce of home maintenance and every positive social interaction she has.  Her handsome, English speaking husband, although at one time employed as a tourguide, has fallen into a pattern of alcohol abuse and dysfunction that is straining her life to a near breaking point.   Each day she is engaged in her work while he is either laying in his room or out drinking with his friends.  He accuses her of inappropriate activity if she takes orders for sewing from male customers but is keen to ask her for money at every turn.   She is safe in that she feels she can counter any potential for physical abuse by the strong police actions against male domestic violence.   But there is little else she can do.  Mexico is not an easy country for women to leave marriages in.  She endures and tries not to complain and is hopeful that he will seek help at some time and begin healing from what she believes is a "medical problem"....

Is it any wonder that I recently learned that a beautiful young woman we know here has chosen a female life partner.  I don't believe every Mexican man is as troubled as Lety's husband, but I do believe that there are many women here who have lives of drudgery and are treated as the possessions of their husbands.  Bigamy and infedility are accepted here.  Somehow the women who are all beautiful, slim, perfectly groomed teens become the overweight, prematurely aged women we see in the town squares and markets.   The years spent at home raising children, providing all the work of raising a family have taken their toll on many.

Young women here are faced with limited choices.  The cost of education is out of the reach for many.  So we will continue to support our student hoping that by becoming educated she will be able to have a better life. 

This weekend we are treating Doraliz to her current dream of seeing the newly released  "Amenecer"...the Spanish version of Twilight Breaking Dawn.  I guess a little fantasy life romance is every girls dream at 16.    And for my husband Gene, this weekend marks the beginning of his 70'th year.   I promised I would give him the birthday of his dreams...and so far at least a portion of it has been spent on the couch too...but hey, isn't that what makes life sweet for a California dreamer! 

My perfect days, and the learning continues...

This half of our year's Mexican life has started off in some ways like so many others, a lot of work catching up and only a bit of play,...but then there was the 36 hour rain!!  I've always said that you can count on uninterrupted sunshine for the 6 months we are here, but this year has been a lesson in climate change (Or something!).   What it has taught me is that no matter where you are in the world, dull rainy weather is not fun!  And in Zihua, it can really rain, and it can be just as dull and uninspiring as it is in Victoria when a very large low pressure system rolls in and sits over the bay.    So when all the world is grey and wet, just like any rainy dull day at home, it's time to watch movies and cook food!  Luckily, both are possible here.  But unlike the dull rainy season at home in Victoria (which lasts approximately 8 months!)...it was over here in 36 hours and life is all good again.   So what makes life good here?   I ask myself that question still trying to identify that special magic that brings us back each year.  
This is my attempt to write about some of our favorite reasons for spending so much of our time here:

1. The people:  and they include both fellow ex-pats and Mexicans.  Some of my favorite people are Doraliz and her 2 sisters, Angela and Lilly who I believe do love us.   Of course, our annual ritual of bathing suit shopping in the mercado in order for them to come to our pool parties on Saturdays helps! 

Having our friends return from their lives in the North is great!  Each day we run into people we have become friends with because we share life in Mexico for several months each winter. It's great to see people looking healthy and well and returning with the same optimism as ever.   It was fun when on a trip out to Barra de Potosi, a little fishing village, seaside resort area south of Zihua, we ran into fellow Vancouver Islanders and Calgarians - women on a dog walk...just like the dog park at home!
2.  The ocean.   When you travel this far south in Mexico, the ocean is a whole different experience.  It is warm and soft and welcoming.  Swimming in the ocean is one of my greatest pleasures here.  Most days it is calm and benign here in the bay, but occasionally, big rollers move in in sets, and then it's time for all the local boys to come out and play in the surf.

3.  Yoga classes. My body and my mind missed yoga...and for 6 months of the year, I can attend yoga overlooking the bay in one of two studios.   Closest to our house is the open air terrace of Hotel Irma with an early morning class, that is attended by mainly locals.  Local ex-pats and local Mexicans.  I love this women's group...each has their own reason for being there, but all of us leave the class knowing that ultimately the class gave us what we were there to receive.  Twice now the teacher has caught me moving ahead in the postures, ahead of her direction.  In a wise, sage-like voice, she has cautioned me to "don't live in the future - stay in the present"....how did she know?   Then how can I not keep returning to Paty's Zihuayoga studio?   Above her restaurant on Playa La Ropa, in a beautiful zen like space, she has created a space for locals and visitors who flock there in increasing numbers as tourist season builds.  
4.  Living in a small town.  I love having familiar places and people who I recognize from year to year both in my own little neighborhood and in the wider city.  I have my favorite shops for fish, vegetables, fresh flowers and even my favorite vendors.   Felix from a small mountain pueblo jumped at my recent spur of the moment, streetside request for a chair cushion made from woven reeds.  Custom made to my specifications to be delivered to me on November 20th!   And I believe him.  


5.  The simplicity of  my life here.  My hairdresser and pedicurist live on my block...I may run into them at yoga class or while walking my dog and arrange my appointment on the spur of the moment.  I can count on the same fresh fruits and fish to be available, so that our diet is pretty much based on what do we want to shop for that day and that's what we'll eat.   Recently Sam's Club moved into Zihuatanejo and we've been encouraged by our property manager and her friend to go...but why?   I went and thought, well, I can do this for 6 months of the year in Canada at Costco, why do I want to buy in bulk and worry about storing/repacking/checking prices etc.   Clothing and footwear range from flipflops to sandals and from bathing suits, to pareos to shorts, blouses and skirts.  The lighter the better. 

6.  The utter ridiculousness of some institutions here, for instance banking.  Scotiabank made a huge deal of  opening a branch here to cater to international (Canadian/US) residents.  But here we are 4 years after the branch opened, and now none of the staff speak English, we line up in queues to gesticulate and attempt Spanish language banking between a 2" space in heavy duty glass walls.   Gene made the mistake of going to the bank without me and came back more determined than ever to begin to learn enough Spanish to cope here.  Cheques written here are routinely returned to us if an "i" is not dotted or a "t" crossed in exactly the way the teller feels it should be.  

7.  Everyone knows and loves our dog Cori...despite having to have endured his annual "haircut" of shame to avoid bringing pounds of sand into our home after his playing ball on the beach...he is still admired widely by Mexicans who ask me if he's "bravo", "macho" or  Just simply smile and point at how beautiful he is!  As I walk through town on our early morning walks, we routinely here calls of "Cori!!"....just like home, not everyone may know my name, but they do know his.

And it's fun living in a beautiful place where special events happen all throughout our season...like this weekend's "Globos Aerostaticos" display happening at 3 of the local beaches.  Hot air balloons, showing up, and giving people lift off rides to about 20' in the air.   Gene and I spent last evening enjoying the sunset from the gracious terrace at the Sunset Bar, Hotel Catalina...and this was our view!

Soon I expect friends to arrive and our project "Sol Sisters" is in full swing....and the much publicized "International Tiritas Festival" to happen!  But I must remember to not live in the future and enjoy the moment in "living the vida loca"!!